Monday, January 28, 2013

WWE Monday Night Raw 1/28/2013 Results and Review

WWE Monday Night Raw 1/28/2013 Results and Review

Last week's show is here:

Rough day today as I missed the first hour. Unfortunately, there is nothing I can do as my class is then. I apologize.

John Cena vs Cody Rhodes
Cody tried to leave mid match and got caught.
Cena then hit him with the AA seconds later to win.

He said he would choose who he would fight at Mania. He said the reason he talked crap on the Rock was to get The Rock to challenge him when he returned. He talked about jousting with The Rock for the last year, which I don't recall after their Mania match.
"I challenge the WWE champion." - John Cena
The Shield then came down.
Cena got beatdown and Sheamus came to make the save. He got beat up then Ryback came.
Cena then got powerbombed as The Shield beat all 3.

The wheel landed on a lingerie pillow fight but Tensai said "No, I'm a monster" and Vickie had Brodus spin the other wheel which had a dance off. I always wondered what would happen if a male landed on that option. Now, I know. Absolutely nothing.

Dance-off - Brodus Clay vs Tensai
Ugh. Well, there was no winner. There goes any credibility Tensai had left...He's doing this when he could be headlining NJPW shows? Ron Simmons interrupted to say "DAMN".

Alberto Del Rio rolled a Body Slam Challenge Match with The Big Show:

Body Slam Challenge - The Big Show vs Alberto Del Rio
Show beat up Ricardo while he duct taped Alberto Del Rio then knocked out Alberto as well. It went a little long and the crowd booed it and chanted boring. JBL didn't feel any sympathy for Alberto because he started it yesterday and when you think about it, I'm kind of on Big Show's side as well. I mean ADR and Ricardo did double team The Big Show and duct tape him yesterday. Seems fair to me.

Las Vegas Showgirls Lumberjill match - Kaitlyn vs Tamina Snuka
No finish here as all the girls went at it in ring. The match was pretty bad up to that point anyway.

He said this moment was the proudest of his career. Then he thanked the crowd. He said Punk's days were over and called him a tattooed homeless freak. He also said everytime Paul Heyman comes out here, he is thinking if he has a bra big enough to hold his deep fried twinkie tits.
Punk was particularly upset and told the whole crowd to shut up. He talked about how The Rock was spoon-fed everything and said The Rock stole the title and didn't earn it. Punk said Rock should give the title back to him.
The Rock dared him to come and take it and called Punk a "punk @$$ b!tch".
Punk then said he might give The Rock a title shot, yes you are reading that right. He said it would be The Rock's rematch in 3 weeks, which is at the Elimination Chamber. The Rock agreed and told him "you won't be taking the title, the only thing you'll be taking is the @$$ kicking of a lifetime".

Vickie spun the wheel:

Tables Match - Sheamus vs Damien Sandow
Sheamus put Damien Sandow through a table to win. The match was your typical tables match. Wasn't bad and at least Sandow had a chance of luck in winning this as opposed to a normal match. I liked Sandow stomping the table leg on Sheamus' arm as I never saw it before.

WWE Karaoke
Great Khali had to sing Shawn Michael's Sexy Boy song and was totally lost.

They had the lyrics for him and he sang something else...It was entertaning though. 3MB interrupted.
Zack Ryder said The Great Khali was into headbanging and he brain chopped Drew. Drew did an awesome sell backwards that had him balance on his neck and kick Slater on accident.

"Welcome to Raw is Jericho."
He talked until Dolph came:
Big E Langston has new tights that show off his thighs. Dolph questioned why Jericho was here since he lost a match that made him leave WWE. Vickie said she signed Chris Jericho and made a match with them. She spinned the wheel and it came up on Strange Bedfellows. I do like the storyline explanation for Jericho's return. That was well done.

Chris Jericho and Dolph Ziggler vs Team Hell No
Kane and DB argued here and then Jericho tagged in Dolph when he wasn't looking. Dolph then got chokeslammed for the Team Hell No win. Not much of a match here.

They announced Trish Stratus for the WWE Hall of Fame.

Paul Heyman's Performance Review with Vince McMahon
Vince used disinfectant on his hands after shaking hands with Paul Heyman. Heyman said he had nothing to do with the Shield. Vince asked if Paul ever lied and Paul said he "lied everyday of my stinking life because I am a promoter. We lie to survive tonight simply to survive tommorow".
Paul said he wants to be here and wants to learn how to be an honorable man from Vince.
They showed a video of Paul Heyman admitting to paying Brad Maddox and The Shield.
They then showed The Shield beating up Brad Maddox and Paul Heyman calling it a "learning experience".  The crowd chanted "You got busted".

"That's not me. I have a thick New York Jewish accent that is easy to copy."
Vince was going to fire Paul Heyman when Brock Lesnar returned.
Brock hit the F5 on Vince McMahon and Paul Heyman freaked out saying "Oh My God Brock, What did you do?" to end the show.

Overall thoughts: Not much of a show match wise but the angles and stuff were all pretty good.

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