Monday, August 26, 2013

WWE Monday Night Raw 8/26/2013 Results and Review

WWE Monday Night Raw 8/26/2013 Results and Review

Last week's show is here:

This is Raw Episode #1057.

The Shield were standing guard. Triple H came out.
Triple H showed us Summerslam clips of Orton taking the title.
Triple H said it was all business, nothing personal. Then we got clips from Raw last week. Cole said none of the Superstars helped out Daniel Bryan last week because they were afraid of getting in trouble with Triple H.
Triple H said last week's rating were high, due to Orton winning the title.

He brought out Randy Orton.
Triple H said Orton gave new life to the title and the company.

HHH gave Randy Orton a new Cadillac Escalade as a gift. Daniel Bryan came out.
"I'm not the biggest, I'm not the strongest, I'm not the prettiest. That's pretty apparent with Twinkle Toes Orton in there." - Daniel Bryan
He then thanked the fans and John Cena, and Triple H. He said he was happy Triple H finally ended the charade of his fake character.

He said Triple H became soft.
DB said he'd rearrange the fance of the WWE and HHH at Night of Champions.
"When you wish upon a star..." - Triple H singing - When you wish upon a star.
Triple H announced Daniel Bryan vs Seth Rollins, Daniel Bryan vs Dean Ambrose and Daniel Bryan vs Roman Reigns, in a gauntlet match, if he can make it through each of them.

They announced that we could choose the stips for CM Punk vs Curtis Axel

Cody Rhodes vs Fandango
Sandow was at the booth.

Cody won quick with a roll-up when The Miz dressed as Fandango. They then made a tag match with Sandow/Fandango vs Rhodes/Miz. One big note is that the lady who was dancing with Miz was Rosa Mendez. She has apparently turned face and isn't with Primo and Epico.

Brad made:

Damien Sandow and Fandango vs Cody Rhodes and The Miz
The faces took control early on the app. They mentioned Jerry Lawler's museum in Memphis, which IIRC, is in a car dealership, but hey, it's a small museum.

JBL called the faces "The Kleptomaniac's" and "The New Klepto's" because Cody stole the briefcase and Miz stole Fandango's gear.

Miz beat Sandow with the Skull Crushing Finale after Cody tripped Sandow. Fandango ran off to the ramp during this, stranding Sandow. Cole said this was because Sandow didn't say his name right either and it might be true since Fandango told us how to say his name after.

Renee Young talked on the app. She encouraged us to vote for the stip tonight. She interviewed CM Punk. Punk said he didn't want to sway the people but said he wanted to get his hands on Heyman. He said Paul deserves worse than the Anaconda Vice.

We got another promo for Los Matadores. It mostly had people yelling Ole, which is what they are trying to get over here.

Christian was interviewed by Josh Mathews. Orton jumped in and said he'd beat Christian tonight. Christian talked about surviving the McMahon-Helmsley era and Christian said that Triple H liked tools and Orton is his new tool.

Paul wasn't happy about the vote and Axel said Punk will lose, so Heyman doesn't need to worry. Axel said Punk can't outwrestle him. Paul said he believes in him like his life depends on it.

They said Punk vs Axel is next.

CM Punk vs Curtis Axel

Paul has to fight Punk if Axel loses.

The match was really not so interesting to be honest. They totally forgot the blood feud stuff and were doing technical wrestling at one point.

Punk won with a surprise GTS in a bomb of a match.

CM Punk got handcuffed as Paul Heyman beat him with a kendo stick. Axel got some shots in as well and Paul went nuts talking about how much he loved Punk and cared for him like a father. The crowd chanted "boring". Paul was great here but something was missing. Maybe it was the crowd and I think the rest was just because it was Axel. He just isn't at this level right now and he doesn't fit.

CM Punk got a bloody back from this.

Natalya vs Brie Bella
Jo Jo did the announcing.

Brie won with a facebuster. Someone went down here on the outside in a small skirmish, but the camera's missed it. This was very short.
AJ Lee came out and mocked Total Divas.
She called them cheap, interchangeable and useless women. She said they weren't good enough to be actresses so they are on this show.
AJ went way too long here. She said she earned her title and her spot. She said none of them could ever lace up her Chuck Taylor's. She called them all "worthless excuses for women" and said "you will never be able to touch me, and that is reality".

Renee interviewed RVD and Ricardo. Renee asked how they became friends. Ricardo said because they are both awesome. RVD said "He is also tutoring me in my A-Spanol". He then said "adios".

Rob Van Dam vs Alberto Del Rio

JBL compared Ricardo Rodriguez to Edward Snowden. On the app, ADR took his usual bump through the ropes. RVD went after him and landed on his feet off a moonsault from the apron to the floor, then got tossed into the rails. They said RVD gets a title shot at the PPV if he wins this.

RVD won with a Cung Le San Shou leg roll pin after Ricardo did the RVD pose on a table which distracted Alberto.. The match was okay but not that great. They dd too much too quick and didn't have time. They also did the best stuff during the break, which few saw.

Renee Young interviewed Fandango. He wasn't happy about what Miz did. He also didn't know how Miz got his gear. He said maybe he went into his personal trailer. Summer then sniffed Fandango's shirt and threw the shirt into Renee's face. Renee said "ew" then gave us the chance to bid on it on WWE Auctions. Way to put that auction over.

I'm pretty burnt out from this show at the this moment. Just throwing that out there. I miss 2 hour Raw's.

Josh interviewed Ryback. He said people are saying he is bullying people. He grabbed Josh by the face and threw him down.

Paul and Axel got interviewed. Paul called Punk the Prodigal Son and said there is more to come.

Christian vs Randy Orton

Christian took a nasty bump when he got pushed off the ropes. Christian then took a bump off the apron.

Randy Orton beat Christian with a thumb to the eye and an RKO. Good match but it went too long and the crowd wasn't into it. Christian's big bump was the highlight here. Rating:***

Daniel Bryan appeared on screen and spray painted Randy Orton's Escalade which they called the "YEScalade". JBL said this was illegal and he should be arrested and I agree. No reason for that.

The PTP's were interviewed by Renee. DY did some dance he called the dirty bird and Titus talked about being in a black sorority. Titus said he lost 10 pounds.

HHH wasn't happy. Brad said everyone in the locker room was laughing.
HHH said Brad should get all of the wrestlers and see what happens to Daniel Bryan tonight. He said anyone who gets involved or looks sideways at the ring will get fired.

Titus O'Neil vs Jack Swagger 
Zeb said Prime Time Players are people who embarass themelves on a nightly basis by acting like "bafoon's and barking like dogs". He talked about welfare and said, "If you can't feed 'em, don't breed 'em". He called the PTP's an inferior team and we got a loud We The People chant.

Titus won with a standing spinebuster. DY messed with Swagger near the end as he knocked his feet off the ropes. This wasn't very good or interesting. They really pushed the PTP dance here.

Bray Wyatt talked about Sister Abigail and how she taught him about how the world is evil and all that stuff.

Punk was refusing medical attention and he said he wanted a match with Paul Heyman. Brad made a handicap elimination match with CM Punk vs Paul Heyman and Curtis Axel. Brad said if Paul backs out, "you're never gonna see him again".

The Real American's were interviewed on the app. They weren't happy with the PTP's being put over. They said this wasn't fair. They made Tony say "We the people".

We ot another Los Matadores promo and they said their bull was coming with them, who is Mascarita Dorada.

Gauntlet Match - Daniel Bryan vs The Shield

Renee asked some wrestlers about HHH and they wouldn't say anything.

Daniel Bryan hit an amazing dive on Seth Rollins.

DB beat Seth Rollins after a monster top rope german suplex. Great match with nutty bumps and both men just going out of their way to do something great. The crowd absolutely loved as did I. Rating:***1/2
 DB then got Ambrose by DQ when Reigns came in and he took a whooping.

Orton RKO'd DB after as the crowd chanted for Big Show.

Overall thoughts:
This was a bit rough at times which ended up being good due to Christian/Orton and DB/Rollins. DB/Rollins is must see as they really went all out.


  1. The crowd were chanting "Walrus" at Heyman, not "boring"

  2. "I'm pretty burnt out from this show at the this moment. Just throwing that out there. I miss 2 hour Raw's."

    the same thought passed my mind several times per episode for the past few months. it's like, I'm only waiting for this one good thing to happen (either it be daniel bryan wrestling, bray wyatt, the shield or punk and heyman's beef .. those are like the main things I look for each episode on RAW) and nothing else seems that interesting.