Lawler won in no time with a fist off the middle rope. Shadow got his butt whooped here and Lawler spend most of the match trying to unmask him.
"Hey, King. I'm sick of you trying to run your mouth about me. I'm gonna shut your mouth today." - Brian Christopher
Doink set up a trap for King while Brian tried to get Jerry to chase him.
"The clown jumped Lawler. The clown put banana peels in the corner to slip Lawler." - Dave Brown
JJ made the save.
Bert Prentice came out with boxing gloves, promising to knock out Miss Texas, who he calls Bubba Johnson.
"I'm the happiest man in the world. I finally got Bubba Johnson in the match I wanted and now I can expose her to the world." - Bert Prentice
"You think Doink the Clown is real funny? Playing in the ring and playing all those jokes? Let me tell you, tonight, the jokes are all over." - JJ on Brian Christopher
"You know, Big Bertha, I know I can beat you in a boxing match." - Miss Texas
Bert came out right after.
"You're gonna expose me? The whole world knows you're nothing but a man in drag." - Bert
"You wish you looked as good as me." - Bert
Doink came out and pied Texas during the argument.
"That is just horrible." - Maclin
JJ and Lawler cleared the heels off. Texas took a nasty bump off of the shot above, hitting real hard. I was shocked too that they had Bert beating her on TV. Really surprised that was allowed and no one got kicked off the air for that.
Jeff Jarrett vs Mr. Clyde
"He got that great looking multi-colored robe on today." - Brown
"Clyde called and said he pulled his hair. He doesn't have much up there now." - Maclin | "He got his head shaved...he doesn't have any hair to pull" - Brown
JJ won with the DDT in no time at all. Nothing much to this and it ended right after it started. Brian Christopher got in the ring after to taunt Jarrett:
Doink came out, pouring oil on the floor and trying to goad JJ into something.
Doink spills oil on the floor
Doink and Brian got some cheap shots in until King cleared them out.
The Moondogs came out:
"Mike Samples, let me ask you a question, brother. These look familiar to you?" - Lee
"Now you're saying you want a rematch. The only way you're gonna get a rematch, hot dog, is to put your hair up." - Lee
"This week we got you in a six man tag. My dogs are gonna beat you down and I'm gonna stomp you through the ring, brother." - Lee
The Moondogs - Moondog Spot and Moondog Splat vs John Thurman and The Scorpion
"And Corey, this one has the lookings of a mismatch here." - Brown
Mike Samples came down to challenge Lee and talk trash, then Doink appeared:
"We're not gonna have that. We've had enough of that pie throwing and stuff. This is ridiculous." - Maclin
"Go to break, please." - Dave Brown
They showed some clips of Lex Luger, since he would be fighting Jerry Lawler this week.
"The only problem is, inside those huge, humongous bodies, they only possessed a little bitty brain about the size of an egg." - King comparing Lex to dinosaurs
"I've always told the people, I'm not the strongest wrestler alive but I'm the smartest." - King | "The USWA Unified title is on the line and if I beat you Lex Luger, then I get a shot at the WWF champion. And that's what its all about to me. I wanna unify the titles once and for all." - King
The Bruise Brothers vs TD Steel and Jimmy Sadler
"This is the chiropractic college today of the USWA. They are adjusting backs. Want your back adjusted, Corey? Get in line." - Samples
Todd Johnson is in here but for some reason, they didn't label him as such.
"WHAT IN THE WORLD?" - Maclin
"This is just disgusting." - Maclin
"You don't get the name Bruise Brothers because you're a nice guy." - Samples
The heels finally won with the powerbomb in this squash. Thank God too as the bumps they had Todd Johnson take were just plain wrong. No idea what anyone was thinking there, except they weren't. They went too far here and Johnson really could have been messed up.
"This is a cup of coffee. What somebody needs to do is have Jeff Jarrett wake up and smell some." - Brian
Brian ripped JJ and said he meant business.
We got the same PG-13 rap from last week. Here's the lyrics:
I'm JC Ice and I'm Wolfie D. We're coming on strong to the T-O-P.
We're lean, mean fighters, not storybook writers
Step up punk cuz we'll play ya like (???)
The name's PG-13 and there's no two greater
All the ladies wanna know, hey what you doin' later?
Everybody step aside because we can't be stopped
You're out of shape and out of date and you might get dropped
This is a challenge so accept it if you're brain dead crazy
Make the wrong move and you'll be pushing up daisies
We'll leave you hurting, have you saying please
Get off me JC Ice and Sir Wolfie D
Taking out suckas like you've never seen
Everybody jump up for PG-13
TD Steel and Jimmy Sadler vs Brian Christopher and Doink the Clown
"Look at that face. He's not clowning around, he's wrestling." - Brown
Doink got the win on Steel with the submission above. Doink was really awesome here. He stretched the crap out of his opponents and really brutalized them with simple but effective holds. He had that great evil smirk the whole time and really looked like something straight out of a horror movie. I never thought twice before about Doink but if this is what his heel run was like, I needed to see that yesterday. Really great performance by him and he looked like a bad bad dude. The lower rope also broke during this match but Doink was putting on such a clinic that it didn't even matter.
"You better keep your words soft and sweet because you're gonna have to eat 'em one of these days, punk." - Lawler to Christopher
Overall thoughts: Pretty good show. Doink was really good and entertaining and really provided a different feel to the show. I wasn't sure how he would fit in but he was at his best here. He put forth a great performance in the main event and stretched his opponents like he was Billy Robinson. He made the show here and made this one a good one.
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