Sunday, August 18, 2013

WWE Total Divas Episode 4 Review - NSFW

WWE Total Divas Episode 4 Review

Last week's show is here:


Nikki Bella and Natalya were walking past a lingerie store and Nikki wanted to buy something sexy for John Cena.

"I feel like ever since he got hurt, our sex life has gone down the drain." - Natalya

"That's so frickin' hot." - Nikki Bella, not me, I swear!
"I mean, if he doesn't like me in this, I don't know what he's going to like me in." - Natalya
"That black one with the tassles and you on top of him..." - Nikki | "Nicole!" - Natalya
For those keeping score, Nikki bought the pink thing and I have no idea what Natalya bought.
"Oh my God, girl, look at all that up there." - Ariane
"They're worth every penny." - Nikki Bella
"Well I can't help it now, I know what they looked like before." - Brie Bella on staring at her sister's chest.

"I've always had really small boobs." - Ariane
"I think her boobs look great. They're perky and they're cute and they fit her body." - Trinity
"We're definitely trying to get that merchandise sold so we can get more of that chingo chingo in our pockets." - Ariane
"If you pulled yours out right now, I'm sure they'd be looking too." - Trinity
They had more boob talk as they signed merchandise.

Daniel and Brie wanted to go to some restaurant and Brie was worried about what to eat, saying she wanted to lose 3 pounds.

Obviously, Brie Bella = Fatass.
"Ohhh, I want a pancake." - Brie Bella
We then went to TJ Wilson and Nattie's home.

TJ was watching a Royal Rumble and giving Nat no attention.

"What am I wearing? Nothing." - Natalya
"Like, I don't know if I have to dress up as Daniel Bryan to get him to notice me." - Natalya
Nat was still feeling TJ didn't care and wasn't interested romantically.

Nikki Bella wore something totally skimpy as she met up for breakfast with Jo Jo and Eva Marie.

Proper breakfast attire.
"They said Nikki is so the fat twin." - Nikki Bella | "Number 1, did you really have to use that many O's? And number 2, how rude!" - Nikki Bella | LOL - Me

Nikki then got a small tear or two in for our first cry of the show.

DB and The Bella's were at a restaurant. You know, we've seen them at multiple restaurants and in the next clip, it's the first time I've actually seen them eat something.
"WWE hired us because we are twins. Coming back to WWE, Nikki decided to get her own set of twins." - Brie Bella
Nikki and Brie Bella made a bet to not drink alcohol or eat desserts for 20 days.

"Heyyy, Boo-Boo." - Ariane
Jon had some trouble getting into the car.

Ariane's dog then threw up and she said he'd clean it up by eating it. What a lovely image that was.

They all went together to the breast implant place.
"I can show you my boobs if you want." - Boob lady | "Okay." - Ariane

"POW! I'm like whew, okay girl." - Ariane
Ariane felt them up. The boob lady offered them another chance to see and Trinity said Jon would want to see. Boob Lady said she'd show him with "your approval". She went to get him. Trinity = best gf ever?
Jon Uso - A real man

"This is the one time you get a pass. So you better enjoy this while it's happening." - Trinity

"Knock knock." - Dr. Dean A. Manus | "It's Doc Dean!" - Me
Pass the boob anyone?
They gave her some implants to try on.
"How about you do some routine so I can see what you're working with?" - Trinity
"Drop it. Bounce it girl." - Trinity | "I don't think she meant that literally." - Me
"Something's a little bit off up there." - Trinity
The Bella's were at some healthy drink shop or something, talking about eating healthy.

Nat and TJ were talking about having a small wedding.
"I have 36 cousins alone." - Nat

TJ looked like he was smoking something
She wanted to have a 150 person reception. I don't even know 150 people. Nat didn't think TJ cared about the wedding and was upset.
The Bella's talked about what animals they wanted to be. Nikki said she wanted to be a lioness so she could get all the food.
"I'm gonna kill somebody. I'm so grumpy and hungry that I'm literally going to kill a cow and just eat its flesh." - Nikki Bella, lioness.
We then went to the pool with Trin, Jon and Ariae, who was wearing her fake boobs.

"Girl, I gotta test drive 'em." - Ariane

Trin then told Ariane to get in the pool.
"See, I told you they float. They look like little jellyfish." - Trinity
"Who knew?" - Trinity
We went to Nikki Bella's apartment.
"Dude, is that your muffin?" -  Brie Bella
The one Bella was mad at the other for cheating on the diet and it looked like the one Bella cried for our second cry of the show.

We went to Ariane's apartment with our boy Vincent!

"Hey babe, let's go! Let's see those puppies of yours." - Vincent
"Sweetie, can I name them?" - Ariane's Boyfriend Vincent

Vincent was sweating and named one of the boob's "Janice".

The twins were getting ready for a Summerslam photo shoot.
They argued about the diet cheating and one of them left.

The girls talked more about their argument in a van or something.
"I think it's okay if we don't look identical. We're not clones, we're twins." - One of the Bella's.

TJ had a surprise for Natalya.
"Well, there's a strip club over there. I hope it's not that." - Natalya | "Hah." - TJ Wilson
TJ brought her to a court house to get married. Nat was not happy and didn't agree.
"Maybe the reason I wanted to have a big beautiful wedding is because I don't have any of that with you. I come home to you and you give me a noogie on the forehead like a friend. You pay more attention to the cat than me. You're pathetic" - Nat, laying down the law and making TJ look like a wuss in front of millions of people.
Nat said she wanted to dump him.

Sandra, the awesome WWE seamtress, made a return.

"Oooh I like it." - Sandra
Sandra was going to sew the boobs into the costume. Sandra encouraged Ariane to get the boobs.
"When I watch TV, I don't wanna see no flat chested on my TV." - Sandra
All of the cast of Total Divas talked about the boobs. Ariane went into the locker room and her boobs were missing. Ariane was then needed for the next segment with a boob missing.
"We played a little prank on Cameron. We took one of her fake boobies." - Nikki Bella
"Yes, I stole the breast implant. I thought it'd be funny. Guilty as charged." - Nikki Bella
The Bella's then mocked her.

Ariane said she decided now is not the time for a boob job.

TJ set up a romantic evening for Natalya when she returned home.

Next week: TJ's Family gets introduced and some fighting with Ariane and Trinity.

Overall thoughts: I was entertained by this. It was totally cheesy and fake but totally funny when it wasn't supposed to be. Best episode of the series yet.

No comments :

Post a Comment