Tuesday, November 13, 2012

WWF Primetime Wrestling 5/18/1987 Review

WWF Primetime Wrestling 5/18/1987 Review

"Hello, I'm Gorilla Monsoon."
"and I'm still hurt." - Bobby Heenan
"Are alot of people concerned about you?" - Gorilla Monsoon
"I happen to know my mailman in Beverly Hills is now hunchback from carrying my mail." - Bobby Heenan

Johnny V vs Brutus The Barber Beefcake
Brutus the Barber Beefcake beat Luscious Johnny V with a sleeper in a squash. The story here was that Beefcake split up from the Dream Team which Johnny V managed, leading to this. They also had a previous match where Brutus cut Johnny's hair and gave him that awful looking haircut. This was all squash but the crowd liked it. After the match, Brutii gave him a little haircut.
"There was one man I used to manage who was the greatest at using the sleeper. He's retired now but he was a master technican in the ring. Who is he?" - Bobby Heenan
"Paul Boesch." - Gorilla Monsoon
"That's right." - Bobby Heenan, who I thought was talking about Nick Bockwinkle.
"Maybe next I'll see you and Vanna White will be on Wheel of Fortune" - Bobby Heenan
Iron Mike Sharpe vs Sivi Afi
"He's had a bad forearm for the last 9 years. It just never seems to heal." - Gorilla Monsoon
"He's just unbelieveable. There's no moment of boredom when he's in the ring." - Lord Alfred Hayes
"He now knows he's made a mistake." - Lord Alfred Hayes
The finish
Iron Mike Sharpe beat Sivi Afi after Afi hit a top rope cross body and Sharpe rolled him up and grabbed the tights. Not great or anything but atleast Mike Sharpe is a fun bumbling goof. Sivi Afi was not good here. He threw Sharpe on his head after a hip toss. I never really cared for Afi as he was well below Haku, The Barbian and Tama. This was an alright midcard match.

"Hulk Hogan, even you are going to kneel and bow before the King." - Harley Race
"Can you imagine the Hulkster bowing at the feet of Harley Race? Well with Heenan behind him, I guess you never know." - Craig DeGeorge
"Who is he to make a comment about me at rignside interfering? This guy makes Pee Wee Herman look tough. How old is he? 11?" - Bobby Heenan
The Can-Am Connection - Tom Zenk and Rick Martel vs The Iron Sheik and Nikolai Volkoff
"There you see Duggan outside the ring again. Hasn't he done enough damage already?" - Jesse Ventura
"Duggan paid to sit in a seat, not to interfere in this match." - Jesse Ventura
The finish
Rick Martel pinned the Iron Sheik with a roll-up after Jim Duggan walked in and distracted Sheik with no DQ. Jesse went off about this and rightfully so. Little wrestling here as it was all about Duggan.

"A man buys a ticket, is allowed to sit there with a 2 by 4 and is allowed to enter the ring and the World Wrestling Federation doesn't say a thing to him. A man almost breaks my neck...nobody says anything to him. A man shaves a man's head, nobody says anything to him. You can do anything you want here. That's the rules you want to play by? Fine." - Bobby Heenan telling it like it is.
"A man comes in swining a 15 foot chain. You got one guy that had the audacity to slam a midget. Give me a break!"  - Gorilla Monsoon
"I told him not to touch that midget. You never touch a midget. You never know where they've been." - Bobby Heenan
"Hahaha" - The Cameramen
"You are disgusting. Disgusting." - Gorilla Monsoon
"You had Ms. Betty check your mailbox constantly for mail. She got bit by a wasp while she was out there and the wasp died instantly. Is that true or not?" - Gorilla Monsoon
"I never heard that." - Bobby Heenan
Nick Kiniski vs Frenchie Martin
Nick Kiniski beat Frenchie Martin with a german suplex hold. They didn't do that much but they worked everything well. Kiniski showed some real fire near the end and got the crowd into it, even though they were chanting boring earlier. This match mostly had Frenchie using cheap tactics and trying to stay away from Nick.

Bobby Heenan then received some mail.
"This letter is from Kenny...I'm refering to Ken Patera. It says, "I hope your neck is broken and you definitely have ring around the collar. Isn't that nice? It's the thought that counts." - Gorilla Monsoon
"Obviously he must have mugged somebody for the stamp." - Bobby Heenan
"I've found out that my wife is pregnant and I will be having a child." - Ricky Steamboat

He then challenged Macho Man and said he would accept any type of match.

Tito Santana and The British Bulldogs  - Davey Boy Smith and The Dynamite Kid vs The Gladiator, Jimmy Jack Funk and Barry O
Barry interrupted the introduction because the announcer didn't say the "fabulous Las Vegas, Nevada". By the way, Barry O is Randy Orton's uncle.
"Everyone seems so impreesed with the British Bulldogs and Tito Santana, but there's one person who's waiting to be impressed and that's Danny Davis". - Dangerous Danny Davis
"If the Bulldogs worked for me, they'd be doing it all. They'd be mowing my lawn, washing my car, putting oil in my car. They wouldn't be hanging around with Frito Santana." - Bobby Heenan
The finish
"Matilda's got better legs than the Federette's." - Bobby Heenan
Tito Santana beat the Gladiator with a flying jalapeno. This was just a squash here and no one really did anything. Gotta love Barry O's tights though.
Ken Patera vs Hercules
"Afterall, it was just a sprained neck Jesse. A simple sprained neck. The same kind you get falling off a tricycle." - Vince McMahon
"Well I'll tell you what, let me pull my belt off and I'll wrap it around your neck and give you one right now and we'll see how simple it is." - Jesse Ventura
"I don't think we have time for that." - Vince McMahon
"Well, now we know why Harley Race was here don't we." - Jesse Ventura
Ken Patera beat Hercules by DQ when Harley Race interfered. This wasn't that bad and the crowd was into it, as was Ken. Unfortunately, this is the 80's and you won't get a clean finish between two stars on TV. Billy Jack Haynes ended up making the save here.

The Islanders - Haku and Tama vs Demolition - Demolition Ax and Demolition Smash
Ax hits Tama with a cane
Demolition Smash pinned Tama after a cane shot by Demolition Ax. Good match here. The crowd was really into it and both teams played their roles well. They didn't do anything super special but I enjoyed it and it was fun.

"All I wanna do for the fans of the World Wrestling Federation is to sing my song." - The Honky Tonk Man
"People always come up to me asking for Elvis's autograph saying, you look just like Elvis Presley. I don't know who that is." - The Honky Tonk Man
"Everybody wants to make fun of the Honky Tonk Man. You saw and the whole world saw what happens when you make fun of me, you get to wear one of these right here." - The Honky Tonk Man talking about hitting Jake with a guitar.
Ricky Steamboat vs Butch Reed
Ricky Steamboat beat Butch Reed via countout when they both fell out and Steamboat made it back in. The crowd was hot here and Slick and Reed were both pretty entertaining. This was like 4 minutes tops though but it wasn't bad at all.

Overall thoughts: Fun show. Heenan was awesome here as was Jesse for the little announcing he did. No great matches but some decent ones with and without screwy finishes. Maybe check this one out.

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