WWE Survivor Series 2012 Review
Dolph was in the back with his team saying they already got this won. Zig announced that Otunga would be the replacement for Cody Rhodes and his crew loudly groaned. Alberto Del Rio said they should respect Otunga because Dolph would be eliminated in the first 5 minutes. Dolph tried to pep his team up and said, "come on guys, this is ours to win!" before they cut away.
Pre-show match: Heath Slater and Jinder Mahal vs Team CoBro - Santino Marella and Zack Ryder
Drew McIntyre is back! But he's still not wrestling. I'm curious as to why Jinder and Slater are always the A-team of 3MB, when they would be the least diserable combination of the three. Matt Striker said he doesn't like anything Ryder stands for. He said Ryder has tickets to an upcoming Justin Beiber concert and said that Ryder uses "twitter and facebook to find a date". The heels took control early here working a headlock spot and then keeping Santino away from Ryder. Ryder hit a missle dropkick and a broski boot on Jinder. McIntyre hit Ryder from behind and Jinder Mahal hit a full nelson into a slam for the win. This was just an opening match to wake the crowd up and it was worked as such. Not that bad, but not really good either.
AJ Lee promised to have some evidence of Vickie Guerrerro's fooling around tonight. Any Vickie and Dolph appearance over the last few years would work for that. I think it'd be harder not to have any evidence, or to try to make sense of this storyline.
Josh Mathews tried to interview Little Jimmy but R-Truth said no one was there. He asked if "we were interviewing imaginary people here now?". Truth promised to bring the US title back to the US. Josh tried to talk more about this but Truth said that Jimmy was in the bathroom and didn't know better. Josh apologized to Little Jimmy and Truth asked if Jimmy "put toilet paper around the seat and washed your hands?".
This concludes the pre-show. If you ordered the PPV, they had Scott Stanford and a blonde named Renee Young hyping the PPV preshow.
The 26th Annual Survivor Series
BONUS Traditional Survivor Series Match - Brodus Clay, Justin Gabriel, Tyson Kidd, Sin Cara and Rey Mysterio vs Tensai, Primo, Epico and The Primetime Players
JBL said, "you got three high flyers and an air-craft carrier" when talking about the faces. Rosa was out here and Cole said that her dress was chosen by the WWE Universe. JBL said if Justin Gabriel was a real thrill seeker, "he'd skydive without a parachute". Cara did an awesome Toyota roll into a liger bomb. O'Neil picked Cara up like a baby here with one hand as he took him to the heels' corner. Cara had a pink half Rey/half Cara mask. Cara and Rey held the ropes open for the other faces to dive, then did dives themselves. Clay went for an exploder on Tensai but botched it and Clay landed on his face. Ouch. Tensai hit a senton for the Clay elimination. Lawler asked JBL what was written on Tensai's face and he said it was slang and couldn't tell him, then said it was a pizza menu. Gabriel then pinned Tensai with a crucifix but got beat up after for it. JBL brought up Carlos Colon again and still said he owes him money, even though he got in trouble for it last time. Kidd ended up pinning Titus after he stuck his head through the ropes.
Tyson Kidd then put Epico in a sharpshooter to get the elimination. Cole brought up the screwjob here and JBL said, "I'm sure Bret will be mad about that too". Rey dropped the dime then hit a pin for the win on Primo. Rey walked the ropes, hit a hurricanrana and a 619 before Cara, Gabriel, Kidd and Rey hit dives for the win on Young. Cool ending here and a great opening match. Tyson Kidd, Rey Mysterio, Sin Cara and Justin Gabriel survive for the win1
Kaitlyn was attacked by a girl in a blonde wig who I think they said was Aksana. Eve said, "I'd hate for something to happen to you right before our match" and then Katilyn pushed her down.
Diva's title - Eve Torres vs Kaitlyn
Kaitlyn came out with the wig. King called this a hairy situation. Kaitlyn took the advantage early and Eve tried to crawl out. Eve did a cool reverse rolling triangle choke and then a "skull f***". The announcing was rough here with lots of arguing. Eve begged for mercy then got slapped. Kaitlyn did a kneeling gorilla press and put Eve on her knee. Eve pulled on the ring skirt trying to get away. She then pulled Kaitlyn off the apron into a bad fall. She then hit a neckbreaker for the win. This wasn't that bad at all, but a little long for these girls.
Team Foley argued in the back with Foley saying "enough!". Miz said that Foley didn't pick him but the WWE Universe did and Foley told him to shut up. Foley tried to get a group "bang-bang" on three and Orton said, "I hate you". Foley said, "that means he's ready".
US Title - Antonio Cesaro vs R-Truth
Cesaro ripped on Thanksgiving and wondered what USA had to be thankful for. Whether it was obesity, skyrocketing infrastructure or the economy. He then said the USA can be thankful for having Cesaro as its US champ.
JBL said he talked with Cesaro and that Cesaro is learning Russian as his 6th language through Rosetta Stone. Cesaro did a double stomp onto Truth. JBL mentioned that Cesaro was reminiscent of Buck Shelford from the All-Blacks rugby team. Then Cole said that the All-Blacks are from South Africa, which is wrong as they are from New Zealand. They originated the Haka which the Uso's do before they enter the ring. The Umaga gimmick in WWE also came from the All-Blacks player - Tana Umaga.
Cesaro got the win here with the Gotch-Style Neutralizer. It was hard to pay attention here with the goofy commentary. I spent more time on that then the match. The match was alright but not as good as it could have been.
David Otunga did a TLC commercial saying that people need to come see him if someone you know hes been harmed by a table, ladder or chair. Sheamus then chaired him to end the commercial. Cool commercial there.
AJ Lee came out. She ripped on Vickie Guerrero until Vickie Guerrero came out. AJ showed a photoshopped photo of Vickie eating a burrito with Ricardo Rodriguez. No, I'm not joking. She then showed a picture with Vickie eating JR's BBQ sauce with JR. They then showed Vickie in a bikini dancing with Brodus Clay. Yuck. She called Vickie a "giant sweating monstrosity". Why she didn't show any pictures of her making out with Dolph or pics of her with Big Show is beyond me. AJ said that if Vickie touches her she will get fired. So Tamina came in gave AJ a samoan drop and a superfly splash instead.
Josh Mathews interviewed Paul Heyman. He asked if Punk had anything left in his bag of tricks. Paul asked what tricks? and Josh had nothing. He said Josh was just another member of the WWE Universe. Heyman said that Ryback has taken us back to the caveman era.
World Heavyweight Championship - The Big Show vs Sheamus
Well, it appears that there was no consequences for Sheamus attacking Big Show like Booker promised. Show got tangled in the ropes like Andre the Giant used to and got clobbered. Sheamus jumped off the top and Show did a thudding spear into Sheamus. That had to hurt. JBL said that Show held 22 titles in his career and brought up him beating Hulk Hogan upon debuting. Sheamus had Show in the electric chair position and dropped him. That was really a heck of a spot. Sheamus then hit a White Noise on Show for the nearfall. Show then pulled the ref infront of the Brogue Kick. Ref's and doctors came to look at the ref then Show hit the WMD for the win. Another ref then DQ'd Sheamus. Show said "This is the World Heavyweight Champion you dumb@$$" to the ref. Sheamus then cracked Show with a chair multiple times. Show tried to beg off. The match had its moments, but the finish was bad and I never want to see this match again much less the build to it. Sheamus then hit Show more times with the chair obviously leading us to a chairs match next month at TLC. Sheamus then Brogue kicked Show while he was down.
Traditional Survivor Series Elimination Match - Team Foley - The Miz, Kofi Kingston, Kane, Daniel Bryan and Randy Orton vs Team Ziggler - Dolph Ziggler, Damien Sandow, David Otunga, Wade Barrett and Alberto Del Rio
Ricardo Rodriguez called ADR the real deal to add onto the apex predator nickname for him. Sandow tried to walk out but Kane threw him back in. Kane then chokeslammed him and eliminated him. Kane pushed DB out of the ring after an argument and got hit with a Zig Zag. Kofi hit a monkey flip and Zig did the greatest sell off of that ever. He got a full rotation in and smacked his face hard. JBL brought up calling Barrett the Lord of Lane which was related to gypsy bareknuckle boxers. DB hit the No lock on Otunga and eliminated him. King said, "Otunga unable to settle out of court, he had to tap out". JBL said that ADR is Mexico's greatest export and King said, "Better than taco's?".
Kofi got tripped by Dolph then took a black hole slam and a Bull Hammer(The Souvenir elbow) for the elimination. ADR hit his spinning armbreaker to eliminate DB. JBL brought up ADR's uncle being El Psycodelico and King made a joke about Ricardo's relatives being Jose-A and Jose-B. Miz hit a Skull Crushing Finale out of a pumphandle that Cole called "The Wasteland" which is incorrect. ADR got knocked off the top rope and took a nasty fall into the ring and the hit an enzugiri to the back of Miz's head to take him out.
It came down to Orton vs Ziggler and ADR. Foley put socko on Ricardo after he interfered. Dolph accidently dropkicked ADR which led to Orton hitting the RKO on ADR to take him out. We came down to Orton vs Dolph. Zig got a Zig Zag but Orton kicked out. Orton busted open his lip then hit a hanging DDT. Ziggler was totally out then Orton waited for him. Orton went for the punt kick but got superkicked for the DZ surprise win. Randy is not now undefeated at Survivor Series. I'm not really sure why they had Orton lose it here and it was kind of an odd place to get Ziggler the win. There was no reaction to this at all. The match was alright but mostly heatless and not that special. Just a normal SS match that was given too much time. No one really did anything to stand out and it was hard to get into the storyline of either team.
ProWresBlog Championship and WWE Championship - CM Punk vs Ryback vs John Cena
John Cena is your current ProWresBlog champion defeating CM Punk recently on RAW. As usual, the ProWresBlog title is on the line and whoever wins the match gets it.
Cena's new t-shirt color is black and yellow. JBL said that Cena is 7-0 at Survivor Series. Better not put him in a Survivor Series match or that will get changed quickly. Today is CM Punk's 364th day as champ. Punk is 3-0 this year in 3-way matches for the title and for another fun fact, all 3 people were once members of Nexus.
Punk got chased around early until he eventually got caught. Ryback did a gorilla press into a fallaway slam on Punk. They took Cena out for a bit after throwing him into the steps. Cena had Ryback in the STFU and Punk hit a top rope elbow on both. Ryback then clotheslined them both and threw them both over to boos. Punk and Ryback teamed up to suplex Ryback through a table.
A bunch of guys in black randomly came pn and beat up Ryback. Roman Reigns was one of them along with Dean Ambrose and Seth Rollins. They powerbombed him through a table. Cena was laid out from Ryback and Punk pinned him to get the win. Well, Dean Ambrose finally debuts and the internet can be happy. Reigns is gonna get exposed and Rollins is looking at being the new Justin Gabriel. I feel sorry if you paid for this. You didn't deserve this. Punk wins the ProWresBlog title and retains the WWE title. Amazing how everybody wants to attack Ryback but no one else...Hmm, I wonder...Nah.
Overall thoughts: This would have been an alright Raw but not something worthy of paying $40+ for. There was some alright stuff but nothing great. The ending pretty much sucked too but atleast it will lead to something.